悠悠地我回来了（《与文共舞》作品）

停了好一阵子，矛盾了好一些时间，还是回来写写一些应该被记录以免又“重蹈覆辙”的大小事。有点无奈，又觉得有些责任，我决定想想一些《与文共舞》的题材。顺便大略解说一下《与文共舞》是怎么一回事。为了推动文字事工，同时为我们美安堂重建圣堂的特刊增添内容，《与文共舞》这个写作比赛诞生了，但是坦白说，这种写作的东西，我们很久没接触了，生疏加懒惰，真的很.....不管，不要想这么多，写就写，反正又不是真的要参加什么比赛。二十题题目的选择，还真是让我“眼花缭乱”。就选最近比较贴近生活的题材吧：神啊！你在哪里？对于这个题目，我心里第一个开玩笑的答案是：在你心里！但是仔细想想，这个回答一点都不像玩笑。

“铃……”扰人清梦的电话闹钟提醒了我另一天的开始。脑海里先是一贯的感恩祷告，感谢我仍有生命气息……接下来却是格格不入的负离子想法：又是沉闷的一天。有人说：晚上睡前会为隔天早上设定闹钟的人。是对“明天”怀有希望的人。而我是吗？每天过着同样的生活、重复的动作、一样的人、不变的事，坦白说，这真是有够无趣；或者应该说，我不能满足于现状。在忙忙碌碌的时候，没有时间好好沉淀自己；在忙忙碌碌之后，已经没有精神去多想什么了。繁忙无暇、兜兜转转，好像这都不是我要的、这不是我来到这个世界上的目的，心里空荡荡的。说到目的，我可是把《标竿四十》的五大目的，曾经给天天默念三遍的，不知何时开始，到了一种麻木的地步。甚至会自言自语地问：神啊！我在干嘛？神啊！你在哪里？

小时候，常常天真地在想：会不会某天眼睛睁开，耶稣就像主日学课本里的图画一样，身穿白色长袍坐着，然后对着我微笑。每每想到这里，还会傻傻地眯起眼，然后再慢慢睁开。当然，每次睁开眼睛，映入眼帘的情景还是与闭上眼之前的一样。渐渐长大了以后，开始在教会里、团契里发掘“看见耶稣”的“妙方”，学习敦促自己灵修、读经、祷告。然而，人是软弱的。日子久了以后，开始发现自己慢慢地失去那种对信仰的热忱，甚至灵修祷告也变质，成了每天应该要做的“例行公事”。

其实自己很清楚应该要把当初那种热心和爱心找回来，这是很重要的，没了信仰的人就像是瞎子没了手杖和导盲犬，随时可能发生意外。灵命出了问题，生活就会出岔子，而且出得是连自己都不曾察觉、但旁观者却是看得清楚的乱子。总是要做看到别人的错误之后，才会恍然大悟，知道自己其实也有类似的错误。

记得最近有一次与一位交了基督徒为交往对象的非基督徒朋友午餐的时候，从他口中得到了一些启发。他说，他的这个女朋友是基督徒，所以她一直很希望他也可以成为基督徒，但是他发觉在她身上找不到当基督徒的优点。他又补充，他女朋友每次都不会忘记在饭前做谢饭祷告，但是吃了几口饭之后，就拉下脸来，表示食物不美味类似的埋怨。这个基督徒女朋友前后的举动让他百思不解，不是说要感谢上帝给予食物吗？为何还埋怨食物不合胃口呢？经他这么一说，我顿时感觉自己原本是懒散地坐着，突然自动地把背部都给挺直了一下，脑海闪过一句：我是不是也曾经做过让别人“百思不解”的基督徒呢？这里要强调的不只是谢饭祷告，而是日常生活中面对大小事的时候的所有言行举止。在朋友之中，几乎大家都知道我是个基督徒，但是大家眼中的我这个基督徒又是属于哪一种呢？我有没有让我们的“大老板”蒙羞了呢？

前两个星期，大概是在六月杪、七月头左右的某天傍晚时分，我在放工回家路上看到了一点小事。在等待着交通灯转绿的时候，我看到路旁不知从哪冒出来大概七八 个像是外劳的人，在陆陆续续地越过繁忙的大马路，一个个就在我车身旁很近距离地走过。我当时的第一个反应是转头检查车门上锁了没。但是后来我发现，这些皮 肤黝黑的外劳每人手中都提着大包小包的购物袋，脸上尽是满足的笑容。很显然他们是刚刚发了工资，给家人添粮了。我之所以把这段记得详细，因为他们脸上的笑 容，让我在隔天仍印象深刻。我是不懂满足的艺术，所以不快乐吗？看来外劳们比我更懂这门艺术。他们的生活或许是困苦的，但是却很简单不复杂。这些小插曲， 在我心中有大大的启发。 若真要做到心中可以享有没人能夺去的喜乐，数算恩典，不能仅仅是嘴上说说。

某个团契聚会的晚上，电影会，是某部看过的电影。但是，奇妙的是，再看一次，再一次感动。这是细微的感动，莫大的恩典。我“知道”祂一直在做工，而 且我可以感受到当时的“知道”，不仅仅是停在理智上的“知道”而已。那种熟悉的感觉，想为身边的非基督徒做点什么的感觉，全回来了。在为他们祷告之前，我需要为自己祷告，专心一致地与神说话。记得有位好朋友说过，她很羡慕我有那种意志起个大早独自安静灵修。至今，在我处于属灵低潮的时候，那仍是莫大的鼓励和肯定。

神啊！你在哪里？我似乎听到回答：我在你心里。若我们向上帝祈求帮助，这代表我们相信祂的能力；若祂还未给予任何帮助，这代表祂相信我们的能力。若我们能够真正地安静自己，其实时刻都能感受祂。我给自己拟定一个近期内要达到的目标，我挑战自己，我要做个令人羡慕的人（基督徒）！

你没有想过

你有没有想过？我最近都在想。我也不想去想，但是想到就觉得很不对劲，因为我太习惯在感情走在不对劲的时候，就会希望做点什么来改善。

我自己也不是那种很爱乱想的人，但是你的态度，真的很让人受不了，爱理不理。如果不想要，你就说出来。可能我们下次在等你比较空闲的时候，才来好好聊聊。这不是在找你吵架，只是一句很普通的话，别太敏感了。请不要给我反应好像我在无理取闹，因为我不觉得我是那种会无理取闹的人。你没有讲，但是可能你没有发现，你会这样讲话，其实心里就是有这种感觉，才会给我这种反应。

有没有想过 induce-effect 这种事？我是，跟什么人在一起，就变什么样的人。所以你在我身上，其实可以慢慢地看到你自己，因为我发现自己慢慢地越来越像你，开始不像我自己。你怎么对待我，我就怎么对待你。其实当初我不是这样，当初我对待你的方式是，我希望你怎么对我，我就怎么对你。但是过了一些日子，我发现你对我的态度还是那样，我就开始没力了。我在想，是不是要我以你的臭方式对待你，你才会知道我有多难受？好，现在你觉得不好受了，叫我做回我自己。但是你呢？要继续让我难受吗？

其实每次说到这些事情，我们其实可以用正面的角度，positive的角度去看待的。 但是跟你一起

好像每次，只要不是开玩笑的事，你都会觉得是不好的，觉得认真的时候的我，说的话都像是在找吵架。我记得我说过很多次了，问题，不会因为逃避而慢慢变小不见。趁现在还有还转的余地。我不能无视问题的存在。

你每次都说：我没讲过。我知道你没有讲过，因为你讲话的时候根本不多。

我知道，我们不至于严重到要天分地裂，但是....难道我想正视这点小问题，把它改过来，我做不对了吗？ 不要想再回答我说：我没讲过。我知道你没讲过，因为你想都没想过。

真的，我从来没想过要吵架，我只是要把问题解决。一股脑埋在assignment里，之后开了skype，自己在另一头看戏。好，我会为你找借口，你想在休息的空挡做点自己享受的事。那之后呢？埋头回到assignment，问你的问题，你有几句没一句地在回答。
其实，会不会无理取闹的女生，可能比我这种还更好应付呢？

Today's Mitchell ：感情是需要时间、精神、心思去经营的，如果你不是这样想。我猜我们都做错了决定。

Brief with Infinity

最近大家都在各忙各的，两人的话越来越少。相对的摩擦却多了。
临出门前，要关闭window之前。
他：怎样好我都会爱你的。
我：干嘛突然说这个？
他：你不要问这么多，要知道就好。
我：喔，我会记得的。
其实在这句话出来几分钟之后，原本一直有种说不出的感觉，烟消云散。心软了。
一句不太好的中文程度的句子，威力不容小看。把这阵子的不愉快，处理了。

Today's Mitchell: I'm learning to be carefree toward your careless, I called it "compromise" not "tolerate".

两个人不一定等于我们

吵架次数越来越多。从来没有试过与哪一位先生有过这么频密的吵嘴，还真令人不知所措。我知道你不细心，也不浪漫，更不体贴，就像我爸爸。可能我应该请教我妈妈。但是有时候，还真是会让人上火。不想再让你觉得我是小器、动辄就发脾气的臭脾气大小姐，因为我从来都不是会无理取闹的那种人。我开始认真在想：是不是有些时候，有些事，当做没事会比较好？

不说，不代表没有。这不是我的风格。我认为不说就是一种逃避。尤其以后可能还有大把的日子要一起过。 但是我发现你对吵架有很大的抗拒，甚至把它看成是压力，对它超级非常反感。这时候不禁让我疑惑，人家常说小小吵架其实是好的，要不然你怎么知道我在想什么呢？但是，这个陈述句视乎不太管用在我们陈先生身上呢。他好像认为，只要不吵架，什么都好。他说：“我真的很怕相骂。。”不太好的中文程度，还是清楚地表达了他的不喜欢。

写了这么多，我还是不懂怎么做才好。我知道，要让步，要互相妥协，毕竟两个来之不同家庭背景的人要相处在一起，的确是一辈子的功课。我会花心思，无论看的、听的、读的，学习相处之道，是我认为是commitment的一种表现。但是，又有谁会知道，令人害怕的事情，会不会来得比我学习的速度更快。*怎么又悲观了起来了呢？真是笨蛋*

Today's Mitchell ：我要做我应该要做的，剩下的我会交在祂手中。就像在fb里post的那句status， I ought to pray harder for every single part involves you.

Measuring My Height

It's my birthday night. It's certainly a great day existed to prove us how people around us concern and love us, and also a way for them to show their love and creativity, yeaa, CREATIVITY ! My family and friends tried out all their best and their efforts and these do made my day :)

Some posted on my wall; some called me up to greet me even if he hardly do this (that's my dad!); some wrote something warm for me; some text me oversea... And notable one was, my mom tagged me a birthday greeting video in facebook and she said she tried to learn something new. Awesome! I treasure you guys, absolutely. 

Don't actually wanna record negative matter on this memorable sweet day, but still I think it's better if I could note this here. I suppose you're under stress. I don't expect anything from you for my birthday, as well as your stress. Never know it could bring me down after all. I don't wanna leave any unpleasant memory between us, somehow I suppose there's necessary for me to write it here rather than ignore the problem, else you would never know what's happening. This brought me kind of down, with my tears down too, you got this correct in the phone call. This reminded me the question you asked me this noon:I  just have this assumption that if at this point I do hurt you, you will cry right?

I tend to think non-sense due to the insecure. Stop. No way. I should have look at the brighter side as everyone put so much efforts on me today, I gonna think positively for the sake of my family and friends. I'm kind of "easily-touched" one. And they touched me times today. Still, I have a wonderful 22nd birthday.

And one more, before I forget, Superwoman and Santa Claus aren't fairy tales! lol! 

Noticed this under my blanket in the midnight; from two superwomen, saying this is aiding to rescue my butt !

Who are the two Superwomen? 

Two santa ladies granted my unconscious-birthday-wish to have this as birthday present xD
Who are the two Santa Ladies?

Trick and Treat lunch as the birthday celebration

Blow off the candle and your wishes would be granted (either in your bag or under your blanket)

Abby Hui Ping and Mitchell, birthday girls
Yesss, please bear in mind that 22 still we consider them as GIRL.

Mitchell the DBKK

 

Up up Sarawakian!

Today's Mitchell: "Birthday" is the gift from God which teach me to count on His grace thoughtfully as He will never let me down.

好马不吃回头草

停了好一阵日子，今早因为没水源供应，我无法正常作息去上课，空出了时间在这里写两句。早上的灵修题为：不要回望。金句：保罗写到：“弟兄们，我不 是以为自己已经得着了；我只做一件事，就是忘记背后，努力追求面前的，向着标竿直跑，为要得上帝在基督耶稣里从上面招我来得的奖赏。”（腓三：13-14 节）不短的两句，可是一点也不陌生，之前参加《标竿四十》的活动，常常接触这两句。但是每一次读的时候，都有不同的感触和得着。  

今早就对“忘记背后，努力追求面前”有新的想法。常常我都会把生活的大小事、与家人同学朋友间的相处之道，与所学的，互相做联系；但是对于感情方面，我总是 倾向于“靠自己理智，凭自己感觉”行事。因此我大便吃得还挺不少，因为跌得狗吃屎嘛。。跌跌撞撞之间，多多少少都学会一些基本道理，但是若不回去参考圣 经，恐怕我还得继续吃大便。  

今早这篇灵修，出奇的让我联想到最近才发生的一些小插曲；什么得罪我的事，什么不开心的是，什么丢脸的事，什么难熬的事。。我忘得七七八八了，唯有一件事，还是常挂在我嘴边：前男友。很没必要的一件事。我知道。但是。。。不需要多解释，要不然也只是像在找借口为自己辩护。 

曾经有一位年纪稍长的男性朋友，就提醒了我，叫我把过去都放下。我说我放了，他说我没忘记；他说我怎么还在提他，我说分手了就不能做朋友吗？对！就是这里， 我把人家当朋友，但是人家可不是这么想的，我发现自己连个陌生人都不是了我。这位朋友在我有意无意提到前男友的时候，都会表现得很生气反感，或许他误会前 男友伤害了我。提到同一件事，也有另一个朋友会感到很勉强，只是他不像前者的反应，这位显得比较沉默。终于有一次，发生了一些小争执。虽然心里有些难割舍，但是想想，何苦让自己陷在那种万劫不复之中？没完没了的，始终要给它一个完结，毕竟陈腔滥调说一句：旧的不去，新的不来。 

我常把过去的错误小心翼翼地放在心里，三不五时会拿出来与现有的人事物互相审核审核。换句话，就是相比较，为的是避免重蹈覆辙。但是人都不一样的，事情怎么会一样呢？我把事情搞得很复杂，把别人也弄糊涂了。难怪我这种行为会惹人家生气。我不会，我真的不会。但是，我知道我不是那种怕走路跌倒，就宁愿一辈子坐着就好的人。我会站起来往前面走，虽然我看不到前面是什么，但是祂看得到，所以我甚至可以边走，边闭上眼睛向祂祷告。再说一句老套的，祂关上了我的一道门，必会为我开启另一扇窗；我还是乖乖的等自己发现那扇窗，总好过傻傻的等那已关上一整年的门再开。 

Today’s Mitchell: 虽然有些迟，但是我好像开始有种想让自己成为“一匹好马”的感觉。

当我开始偷偷地想念

“我和大姐说好
老爸 60岁要给他摆第一次大寿
说长不长，再多 9个年头，老爸就60岁了”

“爸妈总说，我们才不盼你们养我们
能养得起自己就不错了。。。”

刚刚从朋友的blog游览了一圈回来，看到了很触我心的几个句子，决定把这一阵子的想念、想法，好好地给它做个记录。最近开始偷偷 地想念爸妈了，这好像是我来这儿读书这么一段日子以来，第一次正视这件事。其实也不是偷偷的想念，只是对他们的感觉，最近特别感性。自从朋友的父亲突然去 世直到最近大大小小的天灾人祸，就对家人，格外地珍惜，只是除了为他们祷告，也不知道我可以做什么。

的确，人越长大，越会 发现对家人，尤其是父母，有说不出的不舍。念着朋友写的给她爸爸摆大寿，不知怎的，眼泪就在框里打转。人生无常，不是我悲观，只是我真的会害怕。看着新 闻，在为世界另一个角落的人祷告的时候，会在想，若那些事是发生在我家，我会怎样；不敢 再继续想下去，只想回家叫妈妈赶快安排什么时候一家去拍张幸福漂亮的全家福。

记得那天接到妈妈的来电，只是打电话来纯聊 天，好像很少有这样。但是我喜欢。妈说她正等着妹妹下班，待会儿要去接她，闲着没事就给我摇了通电话。我说：“哦！是没事做所以才打来kill time的啦。。”她笑了，听得出我在说笑。很短的一通电话，在挂了之后，我很无谓地send了一封message给妈妈，很无谓但是我觉得有价值。我 说：“Thank you la, at least you think of me when you wanna call someone while waiting for CC :)” 出乎意料，她回复：“Of course think of you lah. Bodoh!” 我就知道我这封message有意义。 今早，有小事所以联络了妈妈，临挂电话前，她要我check我的email。开了inbox，原来是要我把假期时间整理出来，email回给她。值得我珍惜的部分，我想copy paste记在这里。管他奇怪不奇怪。

dear girl, pls send yr school holiday time-table when u re free to do so. I brought yr sister to SUPP there, after all, the man said he can help to appeal to get into Matri if we fail to get it ourselves. 100% sure, with cc good result. god bless. he mentioned the water problem at Matri is already solved. bye. god bless u dear. 

Today's Mitchell ：我感觉，想念家人就像谈恋爱的那种sweet。特别我要谢谢妈妈。

APK Semester II for 2011

Well this isn't my APK, yet I start enjoying the process of preparation with my friends who having theirs this semester. APK stands for Asas Pembudayaan Keusahawanan, which is a course that we gonna apply some technique, creative and innovative (I suppose) to market our products. We can choose any product to sell as long as it's something related to our own profession.

Here my friends, who are from International Business (IB) and another one from Entrepreneurship. The one who is doing IB are going to sell her "luggage tags" during the APK while another of our businesswomen is doing "fancy hair clips" for hers. Not to miss the fancy pretty stuffs I loved, I did some support by purchasing as well as DIY with them. Spent my whole morning which I should have working on my lab reports instead of these fancy stuffs. Somehow I found I enjoyed it. Not to forget, I got 3 clips for my sister and cousins; 3 to 4 luggage tags which I think I'm not going to use it as luggage tag as they're too fragile, I rather keep them for some other purposes. 

Today's Mitchell: DIY for little fancy stuffs made my day :)

Simplicity

I'm a simple person, even if there were people saying that I was "thinking too much", still I can concluded that I'm actually a simple one, as comparing to lots of people out there. Maybe this is my personality, my character, or maybe there's some factors triggering.

Firstly, I'm sometime an emotional one, so-called "emo" person. However, I can still handle the emo feeling in myself when it's trying to overwhelm me. Maybe I ain't a high EQ one, but now at least I noticed I have EQ, not really low one. Other than emo, anger is also a part of EQ management as my "homework". I'm doing hard on it, hoping there's anyone can notice and experience the benefit of my change.

Everyone has own problems to face. Or maybe some people prefer not to face it. I found myself always like to get a solution rather than hiding away from the problems, even though sometime really hope to do that. In fact, problem doesn't go away if we ignore it. It will definitely drag you back one day later and maybe double the suffer. So I never like to be the doggie named "courage" in Cartoon Network as it's too tiresome to meet and ignore problem comes one after another, instead I tend to find my way out.

When I couldn't figure out on my own, and also seek no help from the others, I would finally back to Him. He is always larger than my problem, I told myself. One thing that I felt bad is, I always seek for Him only after trying other ways until no way. He should have be the first solution in my list ! Well, back to the previous part, even if I have not much faith, sometime, I will try my best to convince myself as I know I can find no way out other than Him the creator. Maybe there's someone out there is disagree or even laughing at my genuine, it's always better than he/she never hear about Him from me.

Today's Mitchell: My Lord, please bless me wisdom and genuine to overcome the complexity of this world. I would like to be strong with the strength from You, and then You can use my hand to do Your work.

The Parables of the King

Went to Sunday service in Community Baptist Church (CBC), I found there’s another lovely thing I like about this church. Pastor prepared his photocopied script that everyone can have one in our hand. While listening to his preaching, we’re required to “fill-in-the-blank”. This is definitely an interesting way of listening and paying attention to the teaching. Take your time to read this and you'll be blessing :)

The title for today’s sermon is “The Parables of the King Part 1” from Matthew Chapter 13, verse 1-58. Let’s define “Parable”. About the same as I looked through the dictionary in my phone, pastor gave definition of “Parable”----A parable is an earthly story used to illustrate heavenly (spiritual) truth.

Some parables were recorded in the bible, and I suppose pastor is going to explain one by one in the following weeks. I’m looking forward for it as I didn’t used to have such an easy-to-understand sermon when I was in my own church in Miri. Even though I ever heard about this part of bible and understand it before this. His preaching was still attractive for me. And I managed to learn again from the same story. 

The first part I gonna mention here is “The Parable of the Sower”. The story begin like this: “A farmer went out to sow his seed. As he was scattering the seed, some fell along the path, and the birds came and ate it up. Some fell on rocky places, where it didn’t have much soil. It sprang up quickly, because the soil was shallow. But when the sun came up, the plants were scorched, and they withered because they had no root. Other seed fell among thorns, which grew up and choked the plants. Still other seed fell on good soil, where it produced a crop…” (Quoted from Chap 13 Verse 3 to 8)

The story mentioned above is about some responses of people when they received or heard about Jesus Christ or gospel. The seed is presented as the Word of God. The sower is one who shares God’s word. The soil represents the Human heart. Basically there are 4 hearts which means 4 types of responses given.
(1) The Hard Heart – Pathway Soil represents those who hear and does not understand it or rather does not let it sink into their heart. Some of this type of people had already made up their mind that they are not going to be affected by the content of sermon before entering the church. Exaggeratedly I said there may be even some are sitting there looking for grammatical error that the pastor made throughout the preaching.
(2) The Shallow Heart – Rocky Soil represents people with “shallow heart” who joyful receive the Good News of the gospel because of the promise offered. They understand some of the basics but do not allow God’s Word to be rooted in their hearts and make a difference in their lives.
(3) The Crowded Heart – Thorny Soil represents those with “crowded heart” who hears and accepts the Good News, giving hope of a harvest. But thorns grow up and “crowded” and choked the growing seed. The “thorns” here refers to the worldly worries and false sense of security brought on by the materialistic wealth and then crowded the hearts and distracted many believers “choking” them and making them unfruitful.
(4) The Fruitful Heart – Good Soil represents those with “fruitful heart” who hears and understands the Word; then rooted in the Word and bear fruit, i.e. “produces a crop…”
God’s Word can produce different kinds of spiritual fruit in the lives of believers, for instances, Winning souls to Christ; Christian character; Practical holiness; Good works; Sharing needs and blessings others.

From the 4 types mentioned before, I think I gonna admit that I’m so limited and imperfect as I used to be the (3) type of person. Usually when a lot of worldly troubles start overwhelming me, I lost my mind. I shouldn’t have become like this as I have the responsibility to behave myself. So which type you think you are?

Today’s Mitchell: The sermon gave impact to me, and I wish I can record every part and hence able to keep reminding myself about my role.

“Unfortunate is always odorless” 2

Unfortunate is really hard to get over, for me.

I'm home for these 3 days 2 nights, and after fulfilling the main purpose that I came home this time, I got to pay some friends a visit. And this was definitely a really heavy heart and deep-mediating day for me.

After leaving brother to his school, I went to look for my girl friend as my accompany to visit another friend who lost his father few days ago, as I mentioned previously in "Unfortunate is always odorless". As I know, his mother was a sweet one who liked to spend time with her husband and son. This is absolutely a great loss for her and I guess I know how bad she feel. Staring at the calm face, the father who lying in the "freezer" before they get him a coffin, I hardly hold my tears. Felt sour.

After spending around one hour with him, we went for another friend, whose I mentioned before too, both admitted to the hospital. A bless in the unlucky, the wife (my friend) and children were safe. God bless them. However, the husband hurt badly, really bad. He was admitted in the ICU until today only he can be considered as out-of-danger. He smiled at us when I walked to him. Approaching him, I showed my concern. He answered me: " I'll be strong, I was brave, I tried hard to protect my wife and kids... I'm strong.. I used my hand to defend them, my thumb was chopped off.." while talking he raised his right hand up. I hold him as a response. He continue: "I'll be strengthen... But...I loss my leg.." while talking this, he hold his left leg. My tears were rolling down, non-stop, and I didnt wanna stop it. I didnt know what should I say. I only know to wipe my tear and the tears came out again and wiped again. His tears came after mine, and the wife as well as my friend who came along. I wiped mine and wiped his. I could only answer him: "I'll pray for you, I'll pray for you, you're really a brave man.." No doubt, he need a lot of courage to accept everything. But not too bad, the loyalty lovely wife never left him alone. This is love, I defined.

Today's Mitchell: It's a heavy day but I'll bear them in my prayer.

“Unfortunate is always odorless”

It’s complicated. And I picked “Unfortunate is always odorless” as my title as I directly translated it from Bahasa Melayu. This idiom was what we usually used in essay writing during primary school, i.e. “Malang tidak berbau”. Yes, and I always feeling uneasy toward this phase.

Received a shocking bad news in the early morning when I was surfing around with my facebook. A friend pop out from the chat box, wonder so early this fellow online, supposing he was arrived earlier in the office. In few sentences of time, I was informed that he lost his father this morning. What!? I really can’t believe this! That’s the first response I gave him. After some elaborations, I finally got him. I ever met his father last year when we went to his house. I’m so sorry to you, my friend. I don’t know what I can do for you, other than saying sorry. Maybe you’re right; you said you’re glad to know your dad is now in the Heaven, with our Father. Deepest condolences for the family, hopefully his mother can be strong. Rest peace in Father’s arm, uncle.

Here came another terrified breaking news from a phone call, dragged my appetite for my lunch. My friend and her husband were admitted to the hospital due to some social cases. I wasn’t really sure what’s going on, but I definitely felt bad the moment I heard that she harmed badly, and the husband was even worse. I kept saying prayer every moment when this came to my mind. Hoping I know what I can do for her, too. 

Today’s Mitchell: Heavenly Father, please do bless them what they need now. And bless my family every second.

Great Metaphor to Share

感情就像躲猫猫
有时候 找到的不是想要的
有时候 被找到的一点也不想被找到
有时候 却没人发现那个想被找到的
然后就会开始觉得
为什么我不找点容易被看见的地方
为什么我不躲紧一些呢

I read this when I came across my best friend's blog, and I like it so much. Like it, share it, my principle of life. And here I'm trying to translate into simple English (or maybe French in the future, haha...) as I wouldn't like my friends who can't read Chinese to miss out this. You know who you are :)

Feeling is just like Hide-and-Seek the game we played
Sometime, we found the one we never want
Sometime, the one who never like to be found somehow been found
Sometime, nobody find out the one who hoping so much to been found
And then we start to wonder
Why didn't I hide somewhere easier to be found?
Why didn't I hide myself properly so nobody can find me?

Today's Mitchell : Which role I'm now playing in the Hide-and-Seek ?

你承认你认识我吗？

最近被assignment、report、midterm搞得我忙进忙出，晕头转向，差点没时间update一下我的灵修心得。我觉得不能再姑息自己这样，所以硬是挤出一些时间，写一写。题为：决心与榜样。经文：耶稣说：“凡在人面前认我的，我在我父面前也必认他”。（太十：32）

 

今天的《灵修日程》的故事是大概说到作者在家里做谢饭祷告的时候，务必轻松、舒服；但是在公共场合都不敢公开做谢饭祷告，害怕因为公开信仰而被揶揄。看到这里，我想到，似乎我也听说过身边好像有这样的人，感到害怕、有负担，但是心里又有罪恶感。但是奇怪的是，我没想过公开做谢饭祷告，会让我面对这些；反倒我觉得这是与非基督徒朋友开始信仰话题的好机会。就举例说，之前多次朋友看到我祷告的动作，就会笑着说：“小心我把你的份给吃了！”笑了之后，就会问：“你为什么要祷告啊？祷告的时候都说了什么啊？”哈！机会来了！

没错，很多时候，就比如今天谈到的公开做谢饭祷告，就是打开传福音话题的好开始。又自然、又比较不容易让人抗拒。传福音，是每个基督徒都应该知道是他们必须做的，是他们的责任。再严重一点的说法，就是，如果你不把福音传给身边的人，你就是欠了他们。尽管如此，我们要还，别人却不想收，怎么办？就想尽法子，祷告上帝，让我们有智慧，生出让他们愿意听听福音的办法。再强调，公开做谢饭祷告，就是其中一个超棒的法子，就看我们愿不愿意、敢不敢做。

就拿《灵修日程》的结尾当我的结尾。每个人都可以下决心借谢饭祷告来感谢上帝。我们这样做就荣耀上帝，即使我们可能永远不会知道这么做对身边的人会带来什么影响，但上帝在做事，祂可能借着我们的行为举动，让别人看见他们极需要的榜样。

Today’s Mitchell: 虽然我不怕在公共场合公开做谢饭祷告，但有时候只顾着说话，就忘了最重要饭前要祷告！太不应该 =p